emotional intelligence and narcissism in the law
For years, I’ve been very interested in exploring how our emotional intelligence (EQ) affects our lawyering and our work relationships. As I’ve noted before, EQ is one of the multiple intelligences that are becoming more and more essential to our professional success as we enter the Conceptual Age.
A while back, I referred to an article by syndicated columnist Penelope Trunk discussing the growing importance of EQ in the workplace. Tipped by David Maister, I learned that Trunk writes a very engaging and insightful blog called the Brazen Careerist where she posts “daily tips for making work life and personal life one happy, synchronized adventure.” I read through the blog’s archives and found a lot of information and ideas that would benefit new and seasoned lawyers alike.
In a recent post on emotional intelligence, Trunk notes that EQ has several facets. It’s grounded in our:
The post itself is great and it generated a really interesting comments thread (that Trunk participates in). One contributor, citing the work of psychoanalyst Heinz Kohut, defines empathy as “the capacity to think and feel oneself into the inner life of another person.”
This definition really grabbed my attention because I’d just finished reading an article about the rise of narcissism among college students. One of the experts quoted in the piece states that narcissism leads to breakdowns in relationships.
This doesn’t surprise me. Most of us have dealt with narcissists in the workplace. When we interact with a narcissistic coworker, boss or adversary, there’s no real relating going on. It’s all about one person. There’s an absence of empathetic exchange and mutuality, two prerequisites for healthy and rewarding business relationships.
And, I venture, narcissists feature prominently in the pool of people with the lowest EQ.
Excellent post. I’ve been reading more and more about emotional intelligence and how I can develop mine. After reading “A Whole New Mind,” I realized the importance of developing empathy is in the law field. If you haven’t read it yet, I really encourage you to read “A Whole New Mind.” I did a write up about it and how the ideas in the book are applicable to attorneys. I’m really glad I found your site! Great posts!